Guest Commentary: It's OK to get help

There are a small handful of reasons most people come to psychotherapy. Depression and anxiety are the two primary culprits.

Depression is sneaky. You might have a bad day and pass it off as "just one of those days." Then you have a bunch of bad days in a row and pass it off as bad circumstances. When it becomes an issue of not enjoying things anymore, isolating from friends and family, sleeping and eating habits are being affected and you feel tired all the time, it may be time to talk to someone about it.

Anxiety is less sneaky, more like getting punched. Anxiety ties your stomach in knots and makes it very difficult to think or concentrate. Worry becomes your closest companion. Worry because you feel like it's the right thing to do, because you can't help it. Anxiety/worry get in the way of enjoying life daily. Anxiety causes procrastination which causes worry, a very painful and difficult cycle.

People often have some difficulty deciding whether and when they should make an appointment to speak to a psychotherapist. Any thoughts of self harm can lead to making very bad decisions that have life changing consequences. Substance abuse puts you at an even higher risk of impulsive self damaging behaviors or situations. While alcohol or other substances may make you feel better in the short term, use can result in DUI's, accidents or other problems that exacerbate your already poor mood and functioning. If you are having difficulty getting along with family, or struggling at work, psychotherapy can help you figure out what you can do to improve your quality of life in a fairly short period of time. There are just some things that you can't talk to loved ones about, and psychotherapy is a safe place to air your very private issues. Psychotherapy is confidential. A licensed counselor cannot talk about you with anyone without your written permission.

What can you expect when you come to see a psychotherapist? Your first session will be spent describing your struggles with a compassionate, non-judgmental person who is experienced in identifying specific issues that can be addressed to help to improve your mood and functioning. While it is important to be specific about the issues that are causing your mood disturbance, you will not be expected to "tell all" on the first meeting. Disclosing personal information can be very uncomfortable for most of us. Part of your psychotherapist's job is to help you feel more comfortable talking to them. It is important to find someone you feel is a "fit" in therapy, that you can talk to them without increased anxiety. It is OK to discuss this with a psychotherapist, and if after a few sessions you do not feel comfortable you always have the right to seek someone with whom you have good rapport. Once problem areas are identified and a course of action is agreed upon your psychotherapist will help you develop strategies to improve your mood and relationships and decrease your anxiety. If a psychotherapist is not enough to help you address your issues, your therapist will work with your doctor to get the right medicine or other procedures as appropriate.

You can access psychotherapy services by calling the Human Development Center at 834-5520. You will talk with our support staff who will schedule you with a therapist usually within a week or two. HDC in Two Harbors has two primary licensed therapists, Cecilia Bloomquist and myself.

Deb Ellison is a psychotherapist in Two Harbors and Silver Bay. She has her Master's degree in Social Work and has been a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker since 1997. She is trained in EMDR, DBT, and has 12 years of experiencing treating pathological gambling.

Deb Ellison, Psychotherapist at the Human Development Center